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| Fw: The photographer | |
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| Tweet Topic Started: Jan 5 2007, 05:55 PM (701 Views) | |
| Wizz | Jan 5 2007, 05:55 PM Post #1 |
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Hi Wizz, Loved this one..... Have a great day, Cheers, > > > > The Smiths were unable to conceive children and decided to use a > > > > surrogate father to start their family. > > > > > > > > On the day the proxy father was to arrive, Mr. Smith kissed his >wife > > > > goodbye and said, "Well, I'm off now. The man should be here >soon." > > > > > > > > Half an hour later, just by chance, a door-to-door baby >photographer > > > > happened to ring the doorbell, hoping to make a sale. > > > > > > > > "Good morning, Ma'am," he said, "I've come to...Oh, no need to > > > > explain..." > > > > Mrs. Smith cut in, embarassed, "I've been expecting you." > > > > > > > > "Have your really?" said the photographer. > > > > > > > > "Well, that's good. Did you know babies are my speciality?" > > > > > > > > "Well that's what my husband and I had hoped. Please come in and > >have a seat." > > > > > > > > After a moment she asked, blushing, "Well, where do we start?" > > > > > > > > "Leave everything to me. I usually try two in the bathtub, one on > >the > > > > couch, and perhaps a couple on the bed. And sometimes the living > >room > > > > floor is fun. You can really spread out there." > > > > > > > > "Bathtub, living room floor? No wonder it didn't work out for >Harry > >and me!" > > > > > > > > "Well, Ma'am, none of us can guarantee a good one every time. But > >if > > > > we try several different positions and I shoot from six or seven > >angles, I'm > > > > sure you'll be pleased with the results." > > > > > > > > "My, that's a lot!" gasped Mrs. Smith. > > > > > > > > "Ma'am, in my line of work a man has to take his time. I'd love >to > >be in > > > > and out in five minutes, but I'm sure you'd be disappointed with > >that." > > > > > > > > "Don't I know it," said Mrs. Smith quietly. > > > > > > > > The photographer opened his briefcase and pulled out a portfolio >of > > > > his baby pictures. > > > > > > > > "This was done on the top of a bus," he said. > > > > > > > > "Oh my god!" Mrs. Smith exclaimed, grasping at her throat. > > > > > > > > "And these twins turned ouy exceptionally well - when you consider > > > > their mother was so difficult to work with." > > > > > > > > "She was difficult?" asked Mrs Smith. > > > > > > > > "Yes, I'm afraid so. I finally had to take her to the park to get > >the job > > > > done right. People were crowding around four and five deep to get >a > >good look." > > > > > > > > "Four and five deep?" said Mrs Smith, her eyes wide with >amazement. > > > > > > > > "Yes", the photographer replied. "And for more than three hours >too. > > > > The mother was constantly squealing and yelling! I could hardly > >concentrate, > > > > and when darkness approached I had to rush my shots. Finally, >when > >the > > > > squirrels began nibbling on my equipment, I just had to pack it >all > >in." > > > > > > > > Mrs. Smith leaned forward. "Do you mean they actually chewed on > >your, > > > > um...equipment?" > > > > > > > > "It's true, Ma'am, yes. Well, if you're ready, I'll set-up my > >tripod and we > > > > can get to work right away." > > > > > > > > "Tripod?" > > > > > > > > "Oh yes, Ma'am. I need to use a tripod to rest my Canon on. It's > > > > much too big to be held in the hand very long." > > > > > > > > Mrs. Smith fainted. > > > |
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2:39 PM Jul 11
